So you may have noticed the deadline for the contest has passed and I'm crazy excited to announce that I was the individual biggest loser. HOLY COW. Today I started with another group eight week training program (not a contest this time but for the most part my same buddies and a couple new ones) and I am stunned and thrilled to announce that I've lost 50 pounds. In 11 weeks. In a healthy, correct way.
I've learned a lot too. While I have a looooong way to go, I am truly almost to the middle of the rack. Last night I went out to a sports store with my youngest daughter and tried on golf outfits. Cute ones. In a regular size. THEY FIT and looked good. I cannot explain the joy, and the sweet thing was, my teen shared it with me. "Mom, try this one on too!" And, "Hey, soon we can share things!" So sweet.
So what have I learned so far? Here's a run down.
*I was absolutely using food to sooth myself, and while it has not been easy, I feel like I'm moving on past that. Life is never easy for any of us, and I've had my days of wanting to just dig into something yummy, but for now, every time, thinking about what my real issue is and deciding that I don't want to hijack all this good work with a meaningless pig out had trumped giving in. I may never be totally over that, but I'm addressing it and winning. One day at a time.
*Working out can be very self-absorbing. I'm not sure that's a bad thing. I spend a LOT Of time at the gym. Today for instance: Tennis from 9-11, Workout with trainer 12-1:15, then I'll be back for Val's killer abs class 5:30-6 and then Pilates 6-7. That's a LOT of time spent just focusing on me. I'm not completely comfortable with that yet, and I'm finding a lot of people who have come to expect me to be available in and instant are kind of shocked when it takes me a couple of hours to get back to them. But in the long run, it will be worth it. Hey, I've spent decades focused on everyone else (and I don't regret it. I have a good marriage and two amazing kids to show for it, as well as some big awards for volunteer work). Now I'm making up for lost time. I'm not sure I can be one of those women at the gym all day long forever, but for now, it's working. I'm sticking with "selfish."
*Skinny women do NOT have it easy. I have learned that while they DO eat a lot of what they want, they also balance it out with good workouts. Today, a really fit friend named Linda was next to me in a tough training. As we all sweated it out she said, "This is what I need to do to eat delicious foods!" I loved that. And realized that some day down the road I'll be in maintenance like her and be able to enjoy some treats by balancing things out.
*People respect and respond to success. Hey, I'm still overweight and I'm certainly NOT the thinnest person at the gym. But I've become a kind of hero for everyone there. I hear them talk about me after I pass by, saying how great I look and how hard I work and how they are inspired. My Goodness. Thin people are inspired by me. That's a big leap from the first days of the contest when I was embarrassed to be in the gym working out.
*Flaunt it. The other day a friend came up to me in the gym and said "Okay, ENOUGH of the huge clothes, Moira. BUY SOME LYRCA." Lycra? me? For real? So I did. Today, for the first time in EVER maybe (I've only played tennis for about 12 years) I put on a form fitting, adorable, kind of tight (in a good way) tennis outfit. I was very nervous when I got to the gym and hesitated taking my jacket off. When I did, my tennis chums all CHEERED. I might not be thin-thin yet, but my friend was right. I'm healthy and I look good. No need to hide it. As we started playing I felt self-c0ncious at first, but in time I embraced my new attire. And I won. In a big way.
*I still don't want to set a "real" goal. I like the idea of: when I reach my goal weight, I'll know it. Heck, I still weigh more than I did when I was nine months pregnant with both kids. But, I looked on a "suggested weight chart" and realized when I was nine months pregnant, I weighed what the suggested weight is for my height. Goodness. No need to go overboard. Instead, I'll know it when I see it. Or feel it.
*I don't need to overachieve. I've been an overachiever all my life. But this time, I'm focusing on one day at a time and small victories (like being able to do a side plank into star! OMG.) I'm going to savor the small wins and move along with them. No more overshooting and then feeling like a failure if I don't make it.
More soon. I'm hoping to take some more weight off these next eight weeks and announce I am officially in the Middle of the Rack. Oh, and I can now do 27 push ups.
Can you believe it?
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